A conversation with a dear friend really got my to thinking about why I choose birth at home and why I chronicle the events. The topic came up as she recalled another friend who chose to birth at home, on her front porch in fact, and chronicle it as well. My friend wondered why people wanted a whole room full of people at their birth, watching and staring. She said, the fact that people were now photographing their births made her feel as though she should have done all of these things years ago as well or that her birth was somehow wrong. I wonder if she felt judged a bit, or regret maybe. Birth culture has changed a lot through the years. Pregnancy is no longer a shameful thing to hide, but to celebrate! Birth is not a one-size-fits-all event and should not be treated as such. Women are now becoming aware of the vast choices that they actually have for their births. Women are educating themselves and making decisions that they feel are best for them, instead of letting another person, whether that person be a doctor, a nurse, a midwife, a husband, a mother etc. We can do research! We can make decisions! We can choose to not be ruled by fear, by the "what if...". I love that I have freedom of choice in how I birth, where I birth and whom I choose to attend my birth. Birth is sacred. Aubrey Smith discusses in her book, Holy Labor, the cultural surrounding birth in the West. By many, birth is viewed as a dangerous medical condition that needs to be controlled. It is quite unheard of to be surrounded my support people who are not trained medical personnel. Although, that is how I choose to birth, surrounded by my husband and women who love me dearly and have been on their own birth journey. Aubrey says "In this way even those who are with a woman in her labor can be transformed as they learn to wait with others in their trials, as they have an opportunity to forgo food, sleep and comfort to support someone who is vulnerable-actions that are done as for Jesus Himself." We surrender our rights to others in fear, trusting that the worst thing possible will be prevented. I believe in God's design. I believe in the body He created and it's ability to birth. I believe in taking care of my body. I believe pain has a purpose. I believe in my highly skilled midwife. More than any of those, I believe in God's guidance, His will and His grace. Brene Brown put it well when she said "I thought faith was an epidural, taking away the pain and discomfort. But faith is more like a midwife-- a nurturing partner who leans into the discomfort with you and whispers 'push and breathe, it's supposed to hurt.'" Here is Jasper's story....
We have welcomed our 9th child! Wow. 9! Never in my wildest dreams. We were certainly not expecting this little one on this night. It was 8:45 pm and we had just sent the last child to bed. I was lying on our bed, finally soaking in some much needed rest and a wonderful massage. Suddenly I felt a pop......then nothing. I told Marcus I felt a pop. He immediately asked "What kind of pop?" repeatedly, as I sat frozen, waiting for something else. I knew that pop. But nothing happened. So, I shifted my weight and rolled to the opposite side and my water began to literally pour. I stood quickly as to not soak my sheets and mattress. Water literally gushed for what felt like forever, soaking my pajamas, the floor and two towels. I could not move, trying my best to figure out what to do. This had never happened before. In seven other births, never had my water done this. Maybe a trickle. This was worthy of the movies. Finally I got changed and the floor cleaned up. Marcus began inflating the pool and I called my birth team. A birth team is simply who you desire to attend your birth. My midwife was first, of course, and I got her voicemail. Then I texted a faithful home birthing friend who has attended three of my previous births, my accountability partners (and dear friends) and my photographer (Heidi Lipford). I finally reached my midwife a half hour later and she hit the road. My photographer and friends arrived at about 10:30 pm. I labored a while outside the pool, then felt the need to further relax. I labored in the pool as it was still filling, for about 15 minutes before my midwife, Lynda Hoskins CPM and her assistant, another midwife Brittany Villondo CPM, arrived at approximately 11:00 am. She checked the baby's heart rate with the Doppler and then let me labor quietly. They both checked the heart rate every 30 minutes to an hour throughout the rest of my labor. My contractions were getting much more intense and I knew it would be time to push soon. Mentally I was not ready and I believe I prolonged my labor by at least an hour as I remained still and breathed through each contraction. After much prayer and surrender to the process, Samuel Jasper West was born at 1:44 am. He took a lot more effort than any of my other babies. He weighed 10 lbs!!! He was 21 in long and his huge monster noggin measured over 14 cm!!! He is the squishiest, most wonderful, little (big) thing ever! There is no greater joy. WE ARE TOTALLY IN LOVE!
